Just some silly jokes to brighten up your Tuesday!
Did you hear about the 90-year-old man who streaked through the Chelsea
Flower Show?
He won the trophy for best dried arrangement.
Did you hear about the idiots who drowned while waltzing?
They were trying to do Riverdance.
Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac?
He lies awake at night wondering whether or not there is a dog.
Did you hear about the guy that lost his left arm and leg in a car crash?
He's all right now.
Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist?
He sold his soul to Santa.
Did you hear about the guy who died from drinking varnish?
A horrible end...but such a nice finish!
Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw?
Did you hear about the dead shoplifter?
He was found squished under a shop.
Did you hear about the boomerang that doesn't work?
It's called a stick.
Did you hear about the paper company that folded?
Or the brake company that's on the skids?
Or the bra manufacturer that went bust?
Did you hear about the butcher who backed into his meat grinder?
He got a little behind in his work.
Did you hear about the dehydrated Frenchman?
His name was Pierre, and that's all he could do.
Or the corset firm that felt the squeeze?
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